This morning's craziness
Megan: Can you make the oatmeal?
Me: of course!
Megan: It's a half a cup of oatmeal, a cup and a half of milk, then put it into the microwave at 70% power for 5 minutes and 38 seconds.  Not 37, not 39, 38.
Me: Sure thing hun...
Megan: What, it's very persnickety oatmeal.
And here's an oldie but a goodie
McDonald's intercom woman:  Hi, can I interest you in one of our new Angus burgers?
Me:  No thanks, we're going to need a minute.
Intercom woman:  Ok, take your time and tell me when you're ready.
Me:  What do you want Megan?
Megan:  I don't know, what are you getting?
Me:  Chocolate dipped cone.  The one's you don't like.
Megan:  Hmmmm, I think I want a butter pecan tillamook waffle cone.  But what flavors do they have?
Me:  You know what flavors they have, do you really want me to ask?
Megan:  Yes please.
Me:  Ugh...really?  I don't want to.
Megan:  Just do it.
Me:  You're just going to get confused and end up ordering something you don't like.
Megan:  Just do it.  I want to hear the flavors.
Me:  Fine, (to intercom) can you tell me what flavors of ice cream they have?
Intercom woman:  (by this point it's been a good 5 minutes and she's irritated)  Well soft serve we have vanilla or chocolate dipped vanilla or we have the tillamook flavors.
Me:  (looking at Megan with contempt as I ask)  What flavors do you have in the tillamook?
Intercom woman:  Uhhhhh....Chocolate, ummmm, vanilla, butterpecan, strawberry....uhhh...chocolate.....ummmm....strawberry, and uhhhh blackberry.
Me:  Thanks, (to Megan) NOW WHAT DO YOU WANT!?!
Megan:  Just a plain vanilla cone.
Me:  (to intercom)  Ok, we'll have a chocolate dipped cone and a va...
Megan:  I want mine dipped to.
Me: (to intercom) ughh....make that 2 chocolate dipped cones.
Intercom woman: Will that be ALL?
Me: Ya
Intercom:  Pull up to the second window.
5 minutes later
Megan:  I don't know why I ordered the chocolate, I hate it.  (as she peels it off and throws it in the bushes)
Me:  I don't know either.
Megan:  Well you knew I didn't like it, why'd you let me order it?
Me:  Jesus Megan, we're never driving through anywhere ever again.  Good god you frustrate me.
Megan:  All in a days work

No comments:
Post a Comment